Dating Guidelines by Alan Heeks

Here are some guidelines to get you started: Make the best of yourself.  If you’ve been living alone, or in a long-term relationship, you may be used to scruffiness.  If you’re dating, you will need smart, freshly washed clothes, a good shave and haircut, and fresh...

Reviving a long-term relationship by Alan Heeks

Taken from from Alan Heek’s  book The joys of all that shared time together, the richness of the family network, the many corners you knocked off each other: there’s a lot to value in a really long-term relationship.  I know several couples in their 60s and 70s...

Life lessons from the movies: Hope Springs

Is changing a relationship like changing a lightbulb? You may recall the old joke about how many therapists it takes to change a lightbulb.  The answer is one: but the lightbulb really has to want to change.  It may take one therapist or less to change a sterile...

Man Up! Part I

One of my friends explained her break-up with her husband: “He wasn’t man enough for me.” Synchronicity being what it is, unexpected, some of the women in my class (I teach a course on men) were complaining about men. Elizabeth said “They need...

Getting married at 50?

Recommended – if you’ve got the right woman! I first got married at the age of 22.  It’s painful for me to look at those wedding photos from 1971: I look so young, and naïve.  And it’s true: my experience of life and relationship was small.  No one in their early...